Feel the rush!!!!!

Aaaah, what a perfect day to skydive!!!!! Clear skies, cool weather, and no wind. The conditions are perfect!! Me and the hubby took our first dive out of a perfectly good airplane in Sept. 2003...then again in April of 2004...now I am itching to go back. I jumped the first time with Mark (he's in the top picture on the left). He was a real joker, which was not very soothing to me. To understand what an accomplishment this was for me, you have to understand one thing...I am TERRIFIED of heights. I am talking pale skin, sweaty hands, on the verge of tears scared. I had never taken a risk that big!! Curt and I started dating at the beginning of 2003. We were both recently divorced, both pretty scared of the future...but we had one thing in common. We were ready to start living. We both knew our relationship would be tough (we worked together at the time)...we both knew that it would take a leap of faith from both of us to just go for it. Don't look back, don't listen to the nasty rumors that our peers at work had started (which at the time devastated me because I used to be so sensitive...I know it's hard to believe), don't listen to anyone! We were ready to feel alive...that is when we decided to jump. I know, it's not the most logical thing, but it was US, and looking back on it, I realize what a turning point that was in my life. We had the idea to jump in early spring of 2003...but I just wasn't ready. I had only been on a roller coaster once and hated it. I was just too scared at that point. I told Curt that we would have to warm up to it. I was thinking we could go to Six Flags and ride a few rides...let me build up some confidence and then we'd go. Curt, apparently, was on a different page. He calls me one day and tells me he signed us up for a hang gliding class in Austin...and we'd be traveling there that weekend. OH MY GOSH. We packed up that Saturday morning and drove 3 hours to go meet our instructor. There were 9 people in our class, 4 gals and 5 gents. By the first run I was the only girl left. We had to watch a video and unfortunately the instructor did have to include what all could go wrong...that was enough for 4 people to get up and walk out. Oh man, what have I done????? After the ground school, we drive to our flight sight. We learn how to assemble our gliders and 2 hours later we are ready to go. Since this is the first class, we will just fly for a minute or two and learn how to land. To do this, you have to stand on top of a hill, balance a 55 lb glider on your shoulders...run and jump. The first time, I ran...tripped...and rolled end over end. Not a good start. Curt picks me up, dusts me off...tells me to get up and try again. I knew this was the man I was going to marry. After endless times of trying, I finally got some air. What an exhilarating feeling. I flew and landed successfully...I look at the top of the hill and see Curt sprinting down to hug me. What a glorious day. I was ready to jump.

We schedule a day to jump at Sky Dive Dallas. It had been a couple of months since our hang gliding day and my nerves were shot. I twitched the whole way to the site. We get there, sign a waiver stating that, in the event of our death, we would not sue the establishment. What a way to start my day. We had a ground school lesson that lasted about an hour so it was now 10:00 am. We get our jumping order...we the find out we wouldn't be jumping until 1:45. We sat outside and watched the other jumpers. Finally, our number was called and we go to meet our tandem instructors. Mark, my jumper, shook my hand and said, "is this your first jump?" "Yes, it is...", I said nervously. "OH boy!!" he replies. "It's my first jump too!!" I laugh nervously and resist the urge to strip out of my jump suit and run as fast as my feet will carry me away from this crazy little man. We get suited up, get our altimeters (the instrument that measures our altitude) and go over the plan. We will go up 13,000 feet, sit on the edge of the door, lean our head back and count to three. At 8,000 feet, Mark will pull the rip chord and we'll glide the rest of the way down. We board the plane, Curt is grinning from ear to ear...I'm fighting off my nerves. It was GO TIME. Before we get in the plane, Curt hugs me and whispers in my ear..."We're doing this for US, for all of the people that said we'd never make it" I knew then I was doing more than sky diving...I was taking a leap of faith in my life...I just had to close my eyes and jump. We reach 13,000 ft and Mark starts to scoot us towards the door. I just took a deep breath and leaned my head back and counted to three. The rush of wind hits me, and we begin our free fall. 120 miles an hour, skin flapping from every uncovered part of my body (I never knew I had that much extra skin on my face!!) We free fall for 1 minute, it is the most intense thing ever. The rush of wind is so loud, it numbs your senses. Mark taps me on the shoulder, I give him the thumbs up...and the rip chord is pulled. The chute opens and then...TOTAL SILENCE. We are now descending towards the earth and a feeling of awe washes over me. Looking down at the ground, I realize how small our lives really are...that the big things that we stress over really aren't that big. We glide down for 5 minutes and land with no problem. I did it, I JUMPED!!!!!!! I swallowed my fears, trusted myself, and JUMPED. I found Curt (he jumped out before me), ran over and hugged him and knew that my fears had been conquered. Not my fear of heights...but my fear of love...my fear of starting over. I was ready to live. In the sky diving community, they don't say "Good luck" or "break a leg" when you are getting ready to fly. They give you a thumbs up and say "Blue Skies!"

So, to those reading, I pose a question. Do you have fears that are holding you back? Insecurities maybe? Go, take a leap of faith with something or some one. Step out of the realm of comfortableness and test your limits. Most of you will find out that you have more courage than you know. As for me and Curt? Well, we jumped. We broke down the walls of doubt and took a leap of faith. It has not been a perfect ride, but it's been worth it.

--Blue Skies,
Pixie