Keep on keepin' on

I haven't been posting the past couple of days because I am in a little bit of a funk, for several reasons. I thought that if I couldn't post anything great and inspiring then I shouldn't post at all, but I have come to realize that I should write about what's on my heart to get it out. Writing has always been therapeutic for me, so maybe this will help. As you may know, from a previous post, my relationship with my father has been a tough one for the past couple of years. I was very excited (and nervous) when I thought I would get to see him this past weekend. My twin brother, who is still very close to him, bought tickets for the 3 of us to go see the Yankees play our Rangers. I agreed to go because I knew that it wasn't fair of me to moan and groan about my relationship with my dad, if I was never willing to try and talk to him. Well, at the last minute my dad cancelled. I must admit that I was MAD. I don't mind him being a jerk to me, but I was so mad that he had the nerve to treat my brother that way. Ryan is the only one that has stood by him through everything. My dad knew how much Ryan was looking forward to this, and since he works for Southwest Airlines, my dad was flying for free. It made me so sad to hear my brother act like he wasn't hurt but I know deep down that he was. That is kind of thing that makes me SICK about my dad. He considers no one's feeling but his own. Needless to say, that is the main reason for my little funk. I think that since I have been wearing my feelings on my sleeve for the past few days, that has cause a riff between my husband and I as well. As you all know, I LOVE LOVE LOVE my husband. I do. He is incredible, and he is the man that completes me, heart and soul. That doesn't mean that we don't get in to it every now and then. We are both so strong minded and strong willed that a fight lasts a lot longer than it should because we are BOTH RIGHT. We have been at each other all weekend and that is not helping my mood. I hate the feeling that is in our house right now, there is tension and we are not working to resolve it. Once again though, I can't expect things to change if I am not willing to change a little myself. It is a trivial arguement so hopefully we will both get our acts together and get out of this rut we are in.

Thank God for my triathlon training! This has helped me so much this weekend, I have been able to go out and run and feel the tension melt away. When I am running I am able to let go of what is bothering me and concentrate on the here and now. I think I over did it though, my muscles are exhausted today. Every time I felt like putting my husband in a head lock, I would go for a run instead. That made for a LOT of running this weekend. :)

Life has its ups and downs. Right now I am down, but I know that I will be up again soon. I know in my heart that God promises that. He never promised a life full of constant happiness and no tribulations. He did promise peace though and He did promise to get us through times like these. He has given me a faithful heart and I know that things will get better. Right now I will just have to choose to concentrate on what is good in my life, and that list is a mile long.

Thought for the day: “We all need love, but we need it most when we deserve it least--when we have sinned against someone, when we have made poor choices, when we have failed. In these situations, ordinary love must become extra-ordinary love.”